Why Are Older Fathers Missing in Pop Culture?

First-time fathers in their 40s and 50s are increasingly common — but is Hollywood interested?

Flip through the canon of modern pop culture, and you’ll find countless depictions of young, bumbling parents trying to balance work, love, and diaper explosions. But where are the stories about first-time fathers in their forties and fifties? These men are increasingly common — but a rare sight on screen.

Instead, when older fathers do show up in movies and TV, their journeys are often played for laughs, as if late-in-life fatherhood is inherently comedic. Take Dennis Quaid’s character in What To Expect When You’re Expecting (2012). As a wealthy older dad expecting a baby with his much younger wife, he’s depicted as a fish out of water. His story is secondary, mostly mined for humorous contrasts with the younger dads-to-be, as if his age makes him less relevant to the emotional stakes of parenting.

Dad jokes

Steve Martin’s character in Father of the Bride Part II (1995) is another prime example. In his late forties, George Banks is stunned to learn he’s becoming a father again — and, at the same time, a grandfather. The film milks the scenario for every drop of comedic awkwardness: George grapples with diaper duty alongside worrying about his cholesterol. While the movie is charming, it doesn’t delve deeply into what late-in-life fatherhood means for a man’s sense of self beyond slapstick humor and a faint whiff of nostalgia.

Even in the 2023 comedy Old Dads, starring Bill Burr, the premise of older fatherhood is used almost exclusively as a comedic device. The trio of middle-aged fathers — ill-prepared to navigate progressive preschool cultures — are caricatured as outdated, grumpy, and perpetually bewildered. Critics panned the movie for being reductive, leaning heavily on “kids these days” humor while failing to explore the emotional complexities of becoming a parent later in life.

This trend isn’t new. Go back to the 1987 classic Three Men and a Baby, and you’ll find three confirmed bachelors — played by Tom Selleck, Steve Guttenberg, and Ted Danson — fumbling through the basics of bottle-feeding. They’re charming, sure, but their age and lifestyle are treated as barriers to parental competence, as though their virility and independence are incompatible with nurturing a child.

Why so rare?

Hollywood never depicts fathers in their forties and fifties raising young children in a way that feels wry, empathetic, and meaningful. Why? Part of the problem is cultural baggage. Fatherhood has long been intertwined with ideas of youth, strength, and vigor. For men in their forties and fifties, cultural narratives often shift toward decline: the midlife crisis, the graying hair, the expanding waistline. Parenthood is seen as an arena for the young and sprightly; older dads are often cast as outliers, their stories told through a lens of comedy or skepticism.

There’s also an unfortunate tendency to equate fatherhood with a loss of masculinity. In many depictions, older fathers are stripped of their autonomy or vitality, reduced to harried, bumbling figures overwhelmed by the demands of parenting. Rarely do we see older fathers as complex, dynamic characters who can be nurturing without being emasculated.

But let’s not ignore the narrative goldmine that older fatherhood offers. These men are often financially stable and emotionally mature in ways younger parents may not yet be. They bring wisdom, perspective, and life experience to their parenting — qualities that could be explored in nuanced, powerful storytelling. Imagine a series where a forty-something father grapples with the dual challenges of late parenthood and aging, while still holding onto his sense of humor, ambition, and individuality. It could be both deeply relatable and profoundly moving.

Call for change

It’s time for popular culture to catch up with reality. More men are becoming fathers later in life due to changing societal norms, career priorities, and advances in fertility options. These stories deserve to be told with depth and authenticity, not just as punchlines.

We don’t need more films where older dads are clueless punchbags for humor. Instead, let’s have narratives that showcase their resilience, vulnerability, and growth. Let’s see stories that honor their journey into parenthood, not as the twilight of their masculinity, but as a new dawn of connection and purpose.

Hollywood, are you listening? Somewhere out there, a forty-five-year-old dad is juggling a Zoom call and a toddler’s tantrum, and he’s got a story worth telling. Let’s make it happen.